Parent Perspective: Reflecting on Childhood, Freedom, and the New Dangers Our Kids Face

I often find myself thinking about my childhood—growing up in a small town where life felt simpler, safer and more free. As a young girl, I had the kind of childhood many of us now look back on with gratitude: we played in the streets until sunset, rode our bikes all over town, climbed trees, and spent most of our time outdoors. There was little distraction, no pressure to "perform," and no constant digital noise. Just the joy of being kids.

I know many parents can relate to this, even if you grew up in a bigger town or city. There was a collective sense of trust and community that gave us the space to explore, fall down, get up, and grow. Of course, even then, our parents worried about our safety—about the possibility of harmful strangers or dangerous situations. Those fears were real and valid.

But today, we’re facing a very different kind of threat. It's not just about physical safety anymore.

More and more evidence is emerging about the addictive and damaging effects of the online world on our children. Social media, in particular, is reshaping childhood in ways we never imagined. The constant exposure to curated lives, the pressure to be seen and validated, and the never-ending scroll of content are creating a mental and emotional burden that many young minds aren’t equipped to handle.

It’s harder now to simply "be a kid." The digital world competes for their attention, confidence, and well-being. And while the internet has its benefits, we can’t ignore the growing concerns: increased anxiety, depression, self-image issues, and online exploitation. These aren't just headlines—they're becoming everyday realities for families around the world.

As parents, all we want is for our children to be happy, safe, and grounded. We want them to experience the same kind of joy and freedom we had. And while we can't turn back time, we can be more aware, more involved, and more intentional in how we guide our kids through this new landscape.

Because the kind of freedom we had—the kind that lets a child feel safe, confident, and truly themselves—is still worth fighting for.

A year ago, a good friend of mine told me about the Smartphone Free Childhood (SFC) movement in the UK, launched the beginning of 2024. It is a grassroots movement which currently have over 137k parents who have pledged delaying giving their child a smartphone until Yr 9/10. Recognising that social media should also be delayed until a child has a better mental capacity to navigate the content they would be exposed to until 16 years old.  We often shared our thoughts about the daily struggle of keeping our kids safe online and more importantly limiting screen time as much as possible. I strongly support the SFC movement and really hope more parents will start to understand the negative impact that smartphones are having on children. Many parents want to be able to contact their children for safety but this needn’t be a smartphone – there are alternative options.

Here are some frightening statistics in the UK given to me by SFC:

• 1 in 5 children aged 2-3 years old own a smartphone – OFCOM – Why ?

• School Readiness Survey – more children not able to write/hold a pencil, climb stairs, toilet ready and lack communication skills when starting school (49% teachers) 

• 75% of 15 year old kids have watched beheading footage 

• 29% of boys interviewed at 14 year olds had seen explicit porn within 24 hours

• 54% girls survey by the Girl Guiding platform confirmed they felt unsafe at secondary school

• 500 muggings daily for children’s smartphone 

• Estimated that short sightedness is at an unprecedented level and within the next 10 -15 years 40% plus children will have long-term vision problems - Myopia is a condition where the eye suffers irreversible damage. 

• 53% increase (over the  last three years)   in emergency mental health referrals over the last three years. Statistic is getting higher. 

• 94% increase of self harm in girls 

• 54% girls presenting with eating disorders in NHS A&E have to be hospitalized due to severity

• Orthopedic emergencies have reduced by 73% as children are spending less time outside.No longer are children breaking bones but they are now demonstrating mental health issues at an all time high.  Dr Vijay Murtek (US Surgeon Gen) said the mental health crisis in the young is a global emergency.   

For me personally, this is not the kind of upbringing I want my children to experience by interacting with a virtual world and not the real world.  My daughter is currently in Year 7 and has a basic Nokia brick style mobile phone, mainly for phone calls and text messages. She has managed to communicate with us well when needed, as she walks home from school occasionally. Her form tutor is aware that she doesn’t have a smartphone and for the most of it, she accesses her homework using Google classroom via her iPad which has a daily limit on. Supportive schools should not be encouraging children to use unregulated devices which are a potential safe guarding issue once on site.  

I have listened to many talks hosted by well known medical professionals around the world. Dr Jonathan Haidt (American Social Psychologist and Author) has written a book called ‘The Anxious Generation’. He also supports the SFC movement. He has done extensive research and summarizes what our kid’s generation is facing. He teamed up with Dr Ragan Chatterjee (UK based medical doctor) and together they have discussed the fundamental differences between online and real-world interactions and how it is affecting young people’s social, emotional, and cognitive development. They discuss why girls face unique risks on social media from damaged relationships and reputations to harassment, and how gaming and pornography are shaping boys’ expectations of relationships. If you are able to listen to his talk, here is the link, you won’t be sorry. 

Link here

Smartphones have been linked to increased anxiety and depression levels. They are a safeguarding risk and proven to affect learning and the kind of cognitive functioning needed for success at school and on the playground.

As a parent, I am also navigating the impossible situation we are facing and the ongoing fear of my kids not wanting to be ‘left out’. Kids need to be kids and fully engaged socially, emotionally and physically with their environment, indoors and outdoors. Allowing them to interact on social media and giving them unlimited, instant access to the toxic online world, we are not enabling them to grow into healthy adults. 

“Several celebrities have publicly expressed their support for the "Smartphone Free Childhood" movement, a campaign that encourages parents to delay giving their children smartphones until they are at least 14 years old. These celebrities include Benedict Cumberbatch, Paloma Faith, Joe Wicks, Jamie Redknapp, Myleene Klass, and Emma Barnett.” – SFC 

“I’m just another angry parent fighting the eternal, exhausting and depressive battle with children who only want to be on a screen.” – Hugh Grant 

By standing together and having the support of the SFC movement (Essex currently has 3.7k of parent pledging to delay) it has been extremely comforting for us as parents as we navigate this complex journey together. Let’s keep the conversation going! 

Should you wish to find out more about SFC or commit to pledging your support and delaying giving your child a smartphone please see below their website.  

Smartphone Free Childhood website

For the love of our children,

Angie (Wyburns Primary Parent)  

 

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